We are a few weeks into 2020 and you know what that means–it’s time to start planning for summer break. Or at least that’s what it means in my world. If you’re anything like me–beholden to a school year calendar–that’s likely what it means for you, too. Because here’s the thing: no one NOT beholden to a school year calendar would EVER choose to travel during the summertime. I saw a comedian recently who joked about this phenomenon. They were like: oh hey, it’s finally nice outside where we live. Let’s go somewhere else!

But even if you live in, say, Phoenix–where things just randomly burst into flames in mid-summer–it is still a bad idea to travel during the summertime. Because in summer, kids are off from school. So in summer, families can travel. Thus, in summer everywhere is crowded and expensive. And a good portion of everywhere is hot.

So you know. Last summer we went to Italy. Because HOW HOT AND CROWDED COULD THAT BE?

The not-surprising answer is: really hot, and really crowded.

Before we booked the trip, I did a bit of research surrounding exactly how horrifically crowded Rome, Florence, and Venice might be during peak tourist season. And I read a lot of forum posts and blog posts on the subject. The answer was always: really crowded. But here’s the thing about the term “crowded”–it is very subjective. I wanted to SEE how crowded it would be. I wanted to deeply understand what I was getting myself into. But that data did not exist.

So I set out to gather that data.

I spent two and a half weeks in Italy this past July. I visited the big three cities: Rome, Venice, and Florence. And I spent some of those two and a half weeks walking around and taking crowd photos. I did that for you, dear reader. You’re welcome.

Rome in the Summer: The Crowds

We visited Rome from July 10 – 16, 2019. Here’s what that looked like.

Because I hate myself, I began my summer in Italy trip at the Vatican. In retrospect, this was actually a smart move. Because after this, absolutely no crowds could phase me. Observe.

And that was after paying a lot of money for a “skip the crowds” early morning tour which required getting up at 4am on my first full day in Rome post-red-eye and meeting a tour group at like 6:30am. I strongly, strongly do not recommend visiting the Vatican Museums. Ever. To anyone. Even the Pope has his own apartments. You know, to keep him safe from the crushing crowds?

It got briefly better outside of Saint Peters. Until you realize how far away I am when I took this photo. Until you zoom in and realize that ALL of those people snaking around the enormous square are in line to get in to the cathedral. Look back along the buildings in the distance. Yeah. THAT is the line.

And speaking of lines, here’s the line to the one ladies room. This is the outside of the building line. Yeah. Staying hydrated in the heat is important. But it’s not THAT important. Yikes.

I feel like that’s enough of the Vatican for this post. It was also enough of the Vatican for that trip and for my entire lifetime. I could say more about the crushing crowds inside the Vatican museums, but I think I will sum it up fairly succinctly thus:

It is ironic that being the closest to god’s representative on earth felt so much like my personal version of hell.

Fortunately for everyone, Rome is not the Vatican. Here’s Rome in mid-July:

Except that’s NOT Rome in mid-July. That’s the Spanish Stairs in mid-July. This is also Rome in mid-July:

That’s the patio area near the cafeteria of the Capitoline Museums. Which I highly, HIGHLY recommend. The museums, not necessarily the patio or the cafeteria. It was a lovely respite from the crushing crowds at the major tourist sites.

Because that’s the thing–Rome is absolutely crowded. Until you turn the corner. For example, here’s the crowd in the front of the Pantheon:

And here’s the alley behind the Pantheon, not 50 yards away:

Of course I’m not encouraging you to only explore Rome’s alleys. Just know that no matter what, if you are in a crowd, you are a two minute walk away from not-a-crowd. Unless you are walking from the Spanish Stairs to the Trevi Fountain to the Pantheon. And even then, there are other ways to get where you are going. Alleys, even.

The other thing about Rome’s crowds–sometimes they are darn pleasant. Like during aperitivo, which we participated in every night on a small street (not an alley) off of Piazza Navona, which is where we stayed. Observe:

I hate crowds. I have panic attacks and I leave. But I loved Rome, even in July. I would go back again tomorrow. Even if tomorrow were summertime. Just get oh so slightly off of the tourist path and you will fall in love. With Rome, I mean. I can’t guarantee you’ll fall in love with another human. That’s entirely up to you.

Oh and PS: Rome is not known for pizza (though you need to have the tomato pie from Antico Forno Roscioli) most of the pasta is fatter than you may be used to, and aperol spritzes have more alcohol than you’d think. Drink carefully. Or don’t. That might help with the finding love part!

Venice in the Summer: The Crowds

We visited Venice from July 16 – 18, 2019. Here’s what that looked like.

You know how I provided a running commentary for the Rome crowds? And how that running commentary ended on a positive note? Yeah. The Venice portion of this post isn’t going to have either of those parts.

I cannot recommend Venice in the summertime. To be fair, we stayed very near Piazza San Marco. I’m sure there are parts of Venice which are not heaving masses of humanity. But we didn’t find any of those parts because we were stuck in the heaving mass of humanity.

That was along the Grand Canal outside of Piazza San Marco, so obviously the most crowded part of the city. But the little winding alleys were not much better. It was just impossible to take photos there because to pause for a moment would be to be crushed. I have never been anywhere with that many people, and I’ve spent weeks in Disney World. Here’s more of Venice in July:

Heck, there was even gondola traffic! Check it out–it’s like rush hour on I-76, but with gondolas! (And yes, we did take a ride in one. It was both magical and overpriced.)

I’m glad I visited Venice. It’s a thing one should do, and I did it. I won’t likely ever return. But I will absolutely, 100%, without a doubt return to Florence. Here’s why:

Florence in the Summer: The Crowds

We visited Florence from July  18 – 23, 2019. Here’s what that looked like.

What? Were you expecting something OTHER THAN epic crowds? Because I said I loved it there? Yeah no. Florence was worse than Venice, crowd-wise. In parts, and at times. But the thing about Florence is that it is a day-tripper city. It’s filled with people visiting by train and–inexplicably–cruise ship. But once the day crowds left and the sunlight shifted, it became the Italian city of my dreams. Here’s the same area as is pictured immediately above, but after the tourist hoards left for the day:

Now that’s more like it.

But even if you can only make it to Florence for a single day (though that would be a shame) know that Florence, like Rome, has its quiet areas. And like Rome, you don’t have to walk far. Just turn down a random street or two, walk away from the big attractions like the bridge and the Duomo, and you’ll find this:

So. Do I recommend visiting Italy–and its top three cities–in the summertime? Yes. Yes I do. I also recommend Italy in the winter, spring, and fall. Or on a random Tuesday. Or tomorrow. Be right back, gotta go look for cheap flights to Rome. Or Florence. Ooooh or Naples. I’d love to visit Naples…